Week 45 – Back to my old school, flowing and why you don’t want to break your brain
“Wisdom emerges when we slow down. When we have quiet. When we take care of ourselves.” – Ryan Holiday, Wisdom Takes Work
Each week I take you with me into fun moments, Tools, tips, insights, sometimes a small (or huge) fuck-up and above all: things you can apply yourself to create a more joyful, conscious and fulfilling life.
The week of… coaching full-on, meeting new people and returning to a place from the past.
But also: consciously experiencing. Making time for friends. Laughing over a good lunch. Enjoying the sun like crazy. Acknowledging that charging ahead is not the same as making progress.
This week was about balance. About following ambition without forgetting what truly matters.
Back to Wageningen – where it all began
Wageningen. The place where I studied Nutrition and came up with the idea to write a book about Intermittent Fasting. I had an orientation meeting with my “old” (he’s younger than I am, haha) teacher Jan-Willem Noom.
Because I might get to give workshops there for new students. About connection. About positive energy. About making that first period – which is often so lonely when you’re in a new environment for the first time – easier and more enjoyable.
Because I still remember how it felt when I arrived there. Pretty lonely, even though it’s a relatively small school.
And I know my workshop will bring connection. Between people, but also within themselves. They’ll experience they’re not alone. That those early weeks, but also the time after, can be so much more pleasant when you can truly connect.
Nothing concrete yet. But it felt good to be there. To return to where it all started. And especially for a deep, beautiful conversation.
Live and online: both wonderful!
This week a new client started. Live. In the Netherlands. Even very nearby.
And that’s special, because usually I coach online. I have clients from all over the world: China, Australia, Malaysia, Spain, America and Turkey. Truly amazing. I never expected I’d “go global.”
When I started, I thought: I want to help more people live. Face to face. But then Covid happened. I had just rented a space. The huge table where I was supposed to host workshops became my desk.
It was that or no business. And what I learned: online worked like magic. Better than I expected. I could help people wherever they were. No travel time. No location. Just: wherever you are, I am. Because energetically, you’re really together in a coaching bubble.
So what I did was: Change the plan but never the goal.
I wanted to help people with the Tools from Phil Stutz. That was the goal. The how didn’t matter. And now? Now I’m happy that I coach online. Because it allows me to reach far more people.
But this week? Live. Being able to literally touch someone when it gets deep. And that feels good too. I’m grateful that I can do both.
Break in Amsterdam
A day off. A day out. That’s another reason why I love entrepreneurship: when I feel like visiting a friend during the week, I just do it YES!
We took a beautiful walk through the park, visited a super fun shop and enjoyed a delicious lunch at a French bistro. I honestly felt like I was on a mini-vacation.
The best part? Simply sitting together. Talking about how things really are, about family, friends, life. Laughing and enjoying. Lovely.
No agenda. No action. Just being.
And that was exactly what I needed. Because I’m so used to speeding ahead. Action in the Taxi. Work. Doing things. Making progress.
But sometimes you need to slow down, even in the middle of the week. Be conscious. Stand still.
Because no one lies on their deathbed thinking: I wish I had worked more. What they think is: I wish I had spent more time with the people who matter. I know it, but I need to practice it more.
Utrecht, Obsidian and getting out of your bubble
I also went to Utrecht again to see Martijn Aslander. Funny that he sometimes mentions me in his talks: what is that woman from Meppel doing here every time? By now I know his story pretty well, but I always take away something new to help me work better with the tool Obsidian (my second brain).
And I’m just a fan of the place Wonders of Work. The atmosphere is wonderful, the people who work there are great. I had a conversation there and… drumroll: I’ll be giving workshops there in December and January.
I also keep meeting wonderful new people there like Marja Godvliet Lieneke Grollé and Siets Bakker. That only happens if you get out there and don’t stay stuck in your bubble behind your laptop. Live is worth so much more.
Family, gratitude and a deeper conversation about creating
This weekend some family came by. My second cousin (haha) and his girlfriend.
She came to thank me. I had helped her with the funeral of her mother in Poland – the placement of the urn. That was quite the operation. Mainly because of the language. She is also half Polish (like me), but doesn’t speak the language. And that’s something I’m really grateful to my mother for – that I speak Polish.
My sister and I did this 7 years ago for our mother, but the other way around: placing her urn in my father’s grave in the Netherlands. A very different story, much less hassle. I was glad I could help them with my experience.
And as often happens during these kinds of conversations: a deeper exchange unfolded. About life. About what matters. About creating.
He makes music. I write. Of course you always create things to share with others. And the challenge is always to stop trying to guess what others want to hear or read, and instead connect with what lives inside you. What moves you. What wants to come through.
Instead of: “What will others like?”
to: “What wants to flow through me?”
If you try to create what others want, you make something that comes from nowhere. But if you create what moves you? Then it moves others too.
Because people feel that. They feel when something is real. And they feel when it’s forced. And that’s the beauty: when it comes from your flow it is, by definition, good regardless of what others think.
Stop breaking your head over what others might like. Start feeling and creating from flow.
Speaking of breaking your head: Don’t Break Your Brain
This week I continued reading Wisdom Takes Work by Ryan Holiday.
The chapter “Don’t Break Your Brain” hit me harder than usual, because it’s exactly about what I wrote above.
Ryan writes about the 19th-century philosopher and writer John Stuart Mill. At age 20 he had a breakdown: burnout. He had studied and worked himself into the ground under his father’s influence and in the end this collapse saved him, because it turned out to be a wake-up call.
Mill realized that his father’s methods were not sustainable. He turned to poetry, art, music. He fell in love with life again.
His greatest contributions came after the breakdown. They came because he was brave enough to be vulnerable, to re-examine his life and his priorities.
As Ryan says we experience:
“Too much stress. Too much stimulation. Not enough time, not enough nourishment, not enough recovery, not enough care. Not enough stillness. Not enough friendship. Not enough love.”
“Wisdom emerges when we slow down. When we have quiet. When we take care of ourselves.”
And that is exactly what I’m learning. That charging ahead is not the same as progress. That rest isn’t a luxury, but a necessity.
“Wisdom is realizing that even if what you do is important… it’s not that important.
Wisdom is realizing you are not a prison experiment. You are not a machine. You are an ecosystem.
None of it works if some of it doesn’t work. Be careful. Take care.”
Realize that you must not break your brain. Living more consciously brings peace to your mind. For many people this is obvious, but I always seem to need to learn things the hard way and bump into the same stone more often than a donkey, haha. But this is another valuable lesson, hopefully one to remember.
Action in the Taxi: learning to surrender on both sides
This week I learned something important: it’s not just about taking a few days off every now and then.
It’s about surrender. Go with the flow.
Surrender to the moments of rest. Throughout the week. Doing nothing related to work. Like being with family, being with friends, and this past Sunday when I could enjoy the sun so intensely. A cup of coffee in the sun, a walk in the park. The simple things. Heavenly.
Because you know what I’ve noticed? The more I surrender to those moments, the deeper I can enjoy them.
I know high peaks and deep valleys. Especially right now. And I’m learning to surrender to both.
To the action. To the ambition. To the building. But also to the rest. To the doing nothing. To the “just” or actually very special: living.
Steps this week:
Step #1: Landing page almost finished (never-ending task, but it has to be done well).
Step #2: Workshops scheduled and set for my old school.
Step #3: Wrote another piece for my new book.
Finally
This week I learned: following your heart and working hard is beautiful. But not at the cost of life itself.
Not at the cost of family, friends, nature, yourself and rest (not necessarily in that order).
Because no one is exonerated from doing the work. But also: no one lies on their deathbed wishing they had worked more.
Finding the balance between those two? That’s the challenge.
And now you:
What wants to flow through you? Where are you still holding yourself back out of fear of what others might think?
And: where can you let go more and surrender to rest or perhaps lean into action in the taxi?
Thanks for reading!
Agenda
11 November 2025 – Netwerk vol Magie: TONIGHT! You can still sign up NOW! 👉 Sign up
12 December 2025 – Make 2026 the Greatest Year of Your Life at Wonders of Work in Utrecht
30 December 2025 (note: this is a different date than previously mentioned) – New Year’s Workshop at Binnenruimtein Meppel with Mariska van Dam. We’ll breathe OUT the old year and breathe IN the new one, ready to kick off 2026. 👉 More info coming soon!
I guide leaders and coaches with the Tools from Phil Stutz and the StateShift Method. From self-doubt to action. From procrastination to momentum. So they can lead their life and business on their own terms and give the best of themselves.
👉 Contact me for a free clarity call
May the life force be with you, Syl ✨
