(Week 31) influenced (and given a kick in the butt 😉) by Martijn Aslander
YES!! Hi there! And welcome to my very first “Peek in my week” newsletter, where I’ll be sharing beautiful moments, tools, tips, insights, screw-ups, and more, so you can benefit from them too.
The title is a cheeky nod to Van Kooten en De Bie. I used to watch them with my parents back in the day. Didn’t understand much of it at the time, but the name stuck. And now, years later, I’ve got something to say myself. So here we go, let’s dive in!
🏖️⚽ 1 Vacation & animation
Last week I was still on holiday, and for the first time since my divorce, I went on vacation alone with my son to Callantsoog. It sounded like a great idea – just the two of us by the sea. Unfortunately, after two days on the beach, the weather slowly turned into classic Dutch summer.
Luckily, that didn’t bother us much. There was an animation team (hallelujah, because a happy kid means a happy mama) with activities every ninety minutes and lots of football. Perfect if your child is obsessed with it, which mine is – though he definitely didn’t get that from us. Since he was happily occupied, I had plenty of time to read.
📚 2 Book of the week: Not My Shame
By Daniela Tilbrook → Instagram → LinkedIn → Podcast with Hal Elrod → Buy at Amazon
YESSS! Finally read it! This book had been waiting for me for a whole month.
Daniela is a fellow Heroic Coach. We’re both part of the personal development platform I recommend to everyone: Heroic (Yes, that’s an affiliate link. But I wouldn’t attach my good name to it if it weren’t truly excellent.)
In her book, she shares the story of the abuse she experienced in her youth (by the man who was supposed to be her father) and how she ultimately found forgiveness. How is that even possible?
You might be wondering. Read her story. She’s now also four years alcohol-free and personally helped me quit drinking too. 👉 My post about that
Biggest insight from this book: Real trauma work isn’t just about forgiving the other person. It’s about forgiving yourself, for how long you stayed silent, how hard you had to survive, and how you thought you had to carry it all alone.
📖 3 “Structure” on vacation
Even on vacation, I stick to my structure when it comes to my Miracle Morning (based on the book by Hal Elrod). That means every morning:
- Two glasses of water (gotta hydrate!)
- A cup of coffee
- Journaling
- Meditation
- Movement (a walk or a squat challenge for the day)
- Writing down gratitude in Obsidian
As for food… let’s just say there was less (read: none 😂) structure, and I paid the price with regular stomach aches. Lessons learned, you could say 😉 though it was also nice to loosen the reins for a bit.
👩🏻 4 Back to Work: The Tools Summer School
My work week kicked off Sunday evening. And wow, still half in vacation mode, I had almost forgotten I had a class scheduled. In English, no less.
Thank god I had done enough prep before my holiday and realized it just in time that afternoon. By now, I know the topic “The Field” so well that it takes me relatively little time to craft a solid, impactful lesson.
As you might know, I coach using The Tools® by Phil Stutz (check out this beautiful interview with him for more info). His work is raw spiritual, direct, deep, confrontational, and incredibly practical. That’s exactly why I’ve been diving into it for nearly ten years, traveled to the U.S. multiple times for it, and have even been personally coached by him.
The Field? Sounds like something out of a sci-fi novel, right? But we’re talking about one of Phil’s concepts here: it’s an invisible, feminine forcem, an energetic field. The Field doesn’t necessarily give you what you want, but it does give you what you truly need to grow as a human being.
The Four Laws of The Field
- Commitment Do what you say. Simple, right?
- Self-restraint Master yourself when it comes to what drains your energy (scrolling, sugar, shopping…)
- Non-attachment Go all-in, but release your grip on the desired outcome(s)
- Microtransactions See people. Connect, even if it’s just for a moment
🛠️ 5 Tool of the week: The Grateful Flow
Gratitude might sound cliché. But this isn’t just about jotting down a list in a journal. It’s about consciously tapping into the energy of gratitude, for the small things. And that shifts everything.
Especially in this phase of my life (hello: perimenopause and those sudden waves of low mood), I need this tool more than ever. Do you ever experience dips in your mood too? Then check out the explanation and audio of The Grateful Flow.
🎤 6 See me live!
I have a big wish: to bring wisdom with humor to the stage. And I’m taking the first steps, soon you can see me live at these events in 2025:
August 22 – At the book launch of Starten met Obsidian by Martijn Aslander
September 12 – Workshop Vol Vertrouwen Vooruit (moving forward with confidence) in Meppel
November 11 – Speaker at Netwerk vol Magie by Liesbeth Kingma (more info coming)
✨ Are YOU organizing an event or gathering and looking for a speaker with energy, honesty, and substance? I’m available for bookings, and I’d love to be on as many stages as possible. 👉 Book me as a Speaker
💛 Finally
Thank you for reading! Did you find this valuable? I’d love it if you leave a comment, subscribe to the LinkedIn newsletter, and share it. Maybe you can tag someone who could benefit from it too.
May the Life Force be with you, Syl.
